Neurotic. OCD. Anal. Crazy. All are words that have been used, by myself and others, to describe me. What people don't understand is that my neuroses keep me sane. They allow me to have some control in a world that seems to be controlling me. Being organized keeps me sane. Arriving on time keeps me sane. Hanging my clothes the same direction in the closet keeps me sane. And, yes, using coasters keeps me sane!! I make lists, I check off completed tasks, I use spreadsheets (oh, how I love spreadsheets!) and I label my file folders.
My project this week, between migraines, has been organizing bridesmaid dresses. I have been comparing website photos to actual photos of me and/or my friend wearing the dress. Then I enter the style numbers into a spreadsheet (did I mention I love spreadsheets?!) and give them a rating indicating my preference towards each dress. I'm sure many of you would consider working on an excel spreadsheet on a Friday night to be extremely boring. But it works for me. It's a task that I'm good at. There is no (immediate) deadline. And I can start and stop when I need to in order to accommodate my headaches, which are something I seem to have less and less control over.
While feeling the "need" to control things can lead to addiction, eating disorders and the like, I think I'm far from an A&E reality show. I used to have a job where I managed people, schedules and inventory. I loved that job because I was good at it. I believe the world needs people like me just as the world needs calm, laid back people and people who are disorganized and always running late.
I fully admit to being "OCD" but you might be surprised to know that I don't balance my checkbook (online banking is awesome!) and sometimes I don't separate the whites from the darks. So far, I haven't turned any of Jason's underwear pink. :-)
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